Single Lady Hurt by the Contraceptive Culture

A single lady wrote us about teacher training primarily so she could teach young women the truth about contraception and promote the natural methods. She had been hurt by her previous behavior and wanted other young women to be informed and avoid what she went through.  Below is John’s response.

To do what you want to do does not require any specialized training in natural family planning.  I think that much of what you need is in Chapter 1 of our manual, Natural Family Planning: The Complete Approach.

Something else you might find very helpful is a brochure written by Dr. Chris Kahlenborn–“The Pill and Breast Cancer.”  In it he informs us that the Pill has been classified as a Class 1 carcinogen by the World Health Organization and that young women on the Pill greatly increase their risk of breast cancer.  I am going to send a copy of that brochure to everyone who donates to our current fund appeal.  Just sending us a couple dollars will give us your address, and I can send you those copies.  You will want to order more from the publishing source for sharing with young women.  (100 for $25)  When you look at the large graph, the percent, such as 42% or 151%, is the percent of increased risk compared to women who did not use the Pill.

The best thing you can do for young women is help them to realize their own personal dignity and that they do not have to please their “boyfriends” with sex.  They are just setting themselves up to be used, and those guys are not going to be around.  Love can wait. Lust doesn’t.

The best thing you can get from our material is the easily understood covenant statement of sexuality:  Sexual intercourse is intended by God to be at least implicitly a renewal of the marriage covenant.  This gives meaning to sex.  It is not just fun and games. It is a sign of a previously made commitment, a commitment to give of each to the other in the permanent commitment of marriage.

That’s the reason for waiting until marriage — sexual union is a symbol of marriage itself.  Outside of marriage it simply cannot be a renewal of the marriage covenant because there is no covenant to renew.

Some people have had a hard time understanding why sex is immoral outside of marriage but good within marriage.  The covenant idea explains why.  Outside of marriage sex is dishonest, pretending to be what it isn’t.  Inside of marriage it ought to be a physical way of reaffirming the love and commitment first pledged on their wedding day.  This is something that anyone can understand.  It just makes good sense.

There are lots of materials to help young people understand that they should be chaste before marriage, but some of them may miss this fundamental covenant concept.

That doesn’t mean that it makes it easy to be chaste prior to marriage.  People still have to use Christian common sense and not get wrapped up in passionate kissing, etc.  Passion clouds the use of reason.  As one wag put it, God gave man both a brain and a penis but only enough blood to operate one at a time.

Another thing you can really bring out well to young women is that breasts are for breastfeeding.  Read a couple of Sheila’s books on ecological breastfeeding so you are confident in spreading the good word that eco-breastfeed really does space babies — on the average for 14 to 15 months postpartum.  If you get pregnant then, your next baby will arrive when the first baby is about two years old — great natural spacing.

Also, you can teach young women that there are two ways to reduce the risk of breast cancer.  Never take the pill and breastfeed for a good long time.  Every month of breastfeeding adds natural protection against breast cancer.

I would suggest that you also read my two articles on the Sexual Revolution.  They will help to confirm your convictions.   They are easy reads and will help you understand why we are doing what we do at this website.

I hope you find this helpful.  Feel free to write again.

John F. Kippley
Sex and the Marriage Covenant

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